Not Me Monday

Okay...here goes....letting y'all know just how crazy I really am...and giving you all something to smile/laugh/cry about on this early Monday morning!!!

1. I DID NOT.....get Jess' birthday present and go to Jess' house on Friday so that we could go have it framed. And...I DID NOT get up to the man to let him see the print so that Jess could pick out mats and a frame....and look down between the 2 pieces of cardboard....and realize that I DID NOT even have the print with me. And....I DID NOT go out in the pouring rain, using the cardboard as an umbrella to see if the print was in the back of Jess' van. And...I DID NOT call Pappy to look for the print behind the dresser where we stored it so it wouldn't get bent up. And...Pappy DID NOT find it behind the dresser...and he DID NOT put it in a plastic bag and bring it to us so that it wouldn't get wet.

Nope....that DID NOT happen to me!!!

2. I DID NOT go to Wal-Mart and look at the paint in the OOPS section and find a color that I thought might work for our bedroom. Then...I DID not go back on Saturday and look for it again...and wonder why in the world it had been moved from where I originally saw it and be disappointed because it had been sold. And....I DID NOT later on realize that I was in two completely different Wal-Marts.

Nope...I'm always on top of my game and know just where I'm
at....at all times!!!

3. I DID NOT....pick up a can of window cleaner and spray my hair with it, thinking I was using hair spray....and then wonder all day long why my hair was so flat on top!!!

4. And....and this one really isn't funny....but....I DID NOT...forget to write down about 5 different purchases that I made with my debit card...and then wonder why our checking account was overdrawn. NOPE....this NEVER happened...oh, how I wish it had never happened....

:(

What's that saying about a mind being a terrible thing to waste....that's probably true....if you have a mind to waste!!!!!

Blessings,

P.S...please pray for me....seriously!!!

Not Me Monday....Manic Monday

I had no intention of doing a post today about

"Not Me Monday"....

but....I had so many things that DID NOT HAPPEN to me just today...I changed my mind....so, here goes:

1. I did not decide at the last minute to go to Wally World to get my groceries and when I parked I did not look at the mowed field in front of me and see a passion flower growing that I had not seen since I was a little girl....and I did not promptly get out of my car and march across the mowed grass and try to pull up the vine ....and....it did not break off...and I did not bring it home and put it in water to take root.

(Is that considered stealing? I guess if it dies, that'll be my answer, huh?)

2. I did not wonder if every single person I came in contact with in Wally World was also going thru some kind of hormonal change, just like me....EVEN THE MEN....due to their rotten attitudes.

3. I did not back my buggy out of an aisle to let two young ladies get out because a "boy" who worked there wouldn't move...but when he did see them, he didn't practically run over the old...and yes, menopausal woman....and the young chickies did not beam from ear to ear that they had an old woman and a young man both catering to their need to get out of the aisle before the aforementioned OLD WOMAN!!!

4. I did not go thru the check-out and due to a certain item I was purchasing listen to the cashier (another young lady) tell me all about her problems with....shhhh....constipation!!!

5. I did not think to myself while putting my bagged groceries in the cart that the two elderly men passing by me sure did seem to look as though they had been sucking lemons....and the thought DID NOT cross my mind, "wonder if the young chickies thought the same thing about me"!!!

6. I did not get to my car and start to leave and as I was backing out...the man beside me did not find it necessary to hurry and back out before me, almost hitting my car!!!

7. I did not leave Wally World and go to Lowe's and follow a clerk around for 5 minutes searching for wallpaper stripper...and we did not pass right by it before the clerk did not ask another clerk where it was located!!!

8. I did not get to my car to leave Lowe's and a lady come out to get in her car and leave and come over to my car and ask me if I had seen who parked behind her. She did not proceed to ask me to get out of my car to vouch for the fact that the car parked behind her....was kissing her bumper!!!!

9. I did not go to Jess' house and we did not measure how much she needed a shower curtain hemmed...and I did not promptly leave her house and the shower curtain, too!!!

10. And...last but not least....when our precious boys stayed with me this morning....they DID NOT give Nannie lots of hugs and kisses and her head did not swell up double!!!! But...Baby Brother did not refuse to come to Nannie this afternoon because he spotted his Pappy and wanted him instead...:( ....bummer!!!

If I have this much NOT HAPPEN in just one day......

think what next Monday's post is gonna be like!!!

Blessings,

Not Me Monday

Ms. Rhonda said she would like for me to do a "not me" Monday post...so here goes...this is the best I've got!!!

1. I did not allow Pappy to take a wrong turn on Chapman Highway, knowing he was heading toward Sevierville instead of Knoxville (because you know men always know where they are and need no help driving from their spouse)....and I did not beg him to take Boyd's Creek home....and when he refused I did not fuss at him for taking me all the way into Sevierville and into all the Sunday traffic. And...I DID NOT have a panic attack because of the traffic...nope...not cool, calm and collected Deb!!!

2. I did not....and this was about a year ago...but...I did not hit our first born grandson in the head with the car door...or allow him to walk into it (that's my story and I'm stickin' to it) requiring calling his Mom and Dad to hurry home and rush him to the ER because it would not stop bleeding and required being glued back together (at least no stitches were required!!!)

Nope...I would never hurt an animal, or a small child!!!

3. I did not walk for an hour this morning....deciding that today is the day that I start cutting back and getting healthier
(I do this every Monday morning, you know)...then, go to a Mexican restaurant and eat an entire basket of chips all by myself!!! Nope, not me!!!

4. I did not look Jess right in the face and think I heard what she said...shaking my head up and down in agreement....and actually couldn't have repeated a word if my life had depended on it...of course my attention was brought to how I never listen!!!

5. I did not go downstairs to get Cool Whip out of the freezer..and discover...that when we went to the store last Tuesday...and Pappy said he would take the extra things and put them in the fridge in the basement....that he actually put them in the freezer...including a dozen eggs...nope...Pappy DID NOT freeze eggs!!!!

6. And, I did not eat about a dozen little orange candies figuring since I had already downed an entire basket of chips and salsa and chicken fajitas...I couldn't do any more damage!!!!

I know if I thought hard enough...there would be at least fifty more I could add...maybe next week!!!

Blessings,